Ever since I discovered Latin dancing through life’s circumstances, the stark realization hit me that I was not living. What do I mean when I say that? I only truly lived when I lost myself in my craft and my art.
What do I mean when I say lost myself?
I lost all my thoughts. I lost all my worries and anxieties. I lost all my cravings. I lost my past. My ex-girlfriend and minor troubles at work simply vanished. I was totally engaged in what I was doing. For a moment, everything is okay.
This losing myself… This loss of self… This loss of “Henry” … was where peace and freedom were found. This same feeling can also be found when I am working in my profession. To be honest, what I “do” for work is like child’s play to me. Whilst everyone is struggling and complaining, it is simply effortless for me. What I “do” is so instinctive that if you asked how I “do” my work, I wouldn’t be able to explain it.
In the periods where it’s just me and I need to “do” my work for an upcoming deadline, everything melts away. It’s just me doing my craft. For those few hours nothing else matters. No thoughts. No fears. Just focus. “Henry” leaves for a brief period. What remains is a man doing his craft. Once the final product is completed, it is like perfection. Satisfaction to look back at the finished product. No prizes or money or pats on the back. Only satisfaction just for a moment for the sake of “doing” the work.
In those brief periods of dance and work, this is when I truly live. Not when I get a promotion or go on some silly holiday. Not when I’m chasing a pleasurable experience or having sex. But right in the moment when I lose myself in whatever I’m doing. This is my definition of art. Art is something which is done for its own sake. Art is created only for the artist when he is lost in the moment.
There is nothing to achieve in this world except to create art in whatever that may be. This could be dancing, creating a billion-dollar business, cooking, or running. Nothing in the external world can give any lasting satisfaction. Everything and everyone in this world will lead to pain or a chase. Satisfaction can only be found internally and right now.
I realized that creating my art and what I was doing in the present is all I will ever have. Every single external accomplishment or reward will fade. Every single compliment or harsh criticism will be quickly forgotten. All I ever have is what I am doing right now. That is all everyone on this Earth has whether they realize it or not.